Post by Morne on May 14, 2007 1:18:16 GMT -8
Hi there,
I'm new to the forum, so let me introduce myself.
I grew up in a Christian home in South Africa, but that doesn't really make you a Christian. Each person has to find G-d personally, and I learnt that in 1998. Before then I knew about G-d, but I had a fairly deistic outlook, thinking that G-d was somewhere up there and didn't really care much about us down here. I thought that G-d was unfair and impersonal. I suppose it's fair to say that I hated Him, and believed that He hated me. Jesus' death on the cross meant nothing to me, because I didn't understand how something that happened 2000 years ago can affect me today.
In 1998 my world fell apart and I was on the brink of committing suicide, and shook my fist at the sky, saying "If you're really there help me. If there's anybody there, help me". I can't remember the exact words, but it was something to that effect. I was angry and bitter.
A strange peace came over me, and I decided not to kill myself, but instead wait and see what happens.
A few days later, I met a person, quite by accident, who told me about Jesus, and answered my many furious questions. I was still angry at G-d, but this person was patient with me. I gave my life to Christ and things did improve.
But then I backslid. I think the reason was, because I understood G-d at that point but didn't really know Him. I read my Bible but it was still rather meaningless because my biblestudy was self-centered. I used to do the old trick of opening my Bible at a random page and thinking, "This is G-d's message for me". Most of the time the message was, "So-and-so begat so-and-so, and so-and-so begat so-and-so" etc. etc.
Needless to say I started backsliding and spending less time trying to get do His will and more time doing my own. Typical once-saved-always-saved mentality.
Then in 2003 I got involved in a very bad religious sect commonly called the 'Christian Identity Movement', I'm sure many of you know what that's all about. It's basic racist arrogance with a biblical twist. Many people have ended up in this herecy, because of the political situation in South Africa.
Although the teachings are totally wrong, at least it got me reading the Bible and so I learned. But the more I read my Bible, the more I realised that G-d is love and CI is all about hatred and prejudice and honouring the flesh.
I left the CI Sects and started getting into the writings of Lorber and Dudde, which is very New Age, and ofcourse totally false. But since the CI world is so loveless, and New Ageism is all about 'love' it 'felt' right at that point.
Later I realised that the New Age stuff is totally against the Bible although it professes to be Biblical, because it's very self centered and humanistic (man can be God). The moment that finally got me out of that was when one day while praying, I just felt that I needed to let go of all the New Age rubbish and all the teachings of men, and just trust G-d and trust His Word.
That was about one year ago.
Now I read and trust the Bible and test things against the Bible, and my relationship with- and understanding of G-d is growing everyday. Funny enough the more I learn the more I realise how little I know.
I spend alot of time trying to get others out of sects and heresies, since I now see how rampant the lie is, even in the Christian churches. And it's frightening how easily the lie can be believed, even by those who think they 'know' the truth. Because of everything that happened I regard truth and honesty very highly.
I came here because I realized that the Jewish people are the people of G-d and that we gentiles are fortunate to have been grafted into the olive tree. I've also learnt that western thinking is different to Jewish thinking and I'm hoping to learn from you guys, and maybe we can learn from each other.
That's basically my story.
Thank you for letting me join this group. Shalom!
Morné
I'm new to the forum, so let me introduce myself.
I grew up in a Christian home in South Africa, but that doesn't really make you a Christian. Each person has to find G-d personally, and I learnt that in 1998. Before then I knew about G-d, but I had a fairly deistic outlook, thinking that G-d was somewhere up there and didn't really care much about us down here. I thought that G-d was unfair and impersonal. I suppose it's fair to say that I hated Him, and believed that He hated me. Jesus' death on the cross meant nothing to me, because I didn't understand how something that happened 2000 years ago can affect me today.
In 1998 my world fell apart and I was on the brink of committing suicide, and shook my fist at the sky, saying "If you're really there help me. If there's anybody there, help me". I can't remember the exact words, but it was something to that effect. I was angry and bitter.
A strange peace came over me, and I decided not to kill myself, but instead wait and see what happens.
A few days later, I met a person, quite by accident, who told me about Jesus, and answered my many furious questions. I was still angry at G-d, but this person was patient with me. I gave my life to Christ and things did improve.
But then I backslid. I think the reason was, because I understood G-d at that point but didn't really know Him. I read my Bible but it was still rather meaningless because my biblestudy was self-centered. I used to do the old trick of opening my Bible at a random page and thinking, "This is G-d's message for me". Most of the time the message was, "So-and-so begat so-and-so, and so-and-so begat so-and-so" etc. etc.
Needless to say I started backsliding and spending less time trying to get do His will and more time doing my own. Typical once-saved-always-saved mentality.
Then in 2003 I got involved in a very bad religious sect commonly called the 'Christian Identity Movement', I'm sure many of you know what that's all about. It's basic racist arrogance with a biblical twist. Many people have ended up in this herecy, because of the political situation in South Africa.
Although the teachings are totally wrong, at least it got me reading the Bible and so I learned. But the more I read my Bible, the more I realised that G-d is love and CI is all about hatred and prejudice and honouring the flesh.
I left the CI Sects and started getting into the writings of Lorber and Dudde, which is very New Age, and ofcourse totally false. But since the CI world is so loveless, and New Ageism is all about 'love' it 'felt' right at that point.
Later I realised that the New Age stuff is totally against the Bible although it professes to be Biblical, because it's very self centered and humanistic (man can be God). The moment that finally got me out of that was when one day while praying, I just felt that I needed to let go of all the New Age rubbish and all the teachings of men, and just trust G-d and trust His Word.
That was about one year ago.
Now I read and trust the Bible and test things against the Bible, and my relationship with- and understanding of G-d is growing everyday. Funny enough the more I learn the more I realise how little I know.
I spend alot of time trying to get others out of sects and heresies, since I now see how rampant the lie is, even in the Christian churches. And it's frightening how easily the lie can be believed, even by those who think they 'know' the truth. Because of everything that happened I regard truth and honesty very highly.
I came here because I realized that the Jewish people are the people of G-d and that we gentiles are fortunate to have been grafted into the olive tree. I've also learnt that western thinking is different to Jewish thinking and I'm hoping to learn from you guys, and maybe we can learn from each other.
That's basically my story.
Thank you for letting me join this group. Shalom!
Morné
