Polygamy

[Mark]

Where do we stand in on the subject of polygamy?

Deuteronomy 21:15 “When a man has two wives, one loved and the other unloved, and they have borne him children, both the loved and the unloved, and the first-born son is of her who is unloved,

[Golfnerd]

If you look at the men in the Scriptures that had more than one wife, things were ALWAYS ugly.

Solomon - 700 some wives PLUS a BUNCH more concubines - because of his actions regarding pagan worship, God took the kingdom away.

David and Bathsheba, Abraham and Hagar...etc.

I beleive the verses in Gen 2 mean exactly what they say...ONE man with ONE woman become ONE flesh.

[Nachshon]

If you look at I Tim 3:2 you see that the leaders were supposed to have only one wife. Why is this? Because the leaders were an example to the rest of the people. This does not mean that polygamy is forbidden, but that it isn't ideal. I believe that, while it is allowed, or tolerated if you will, it is not best.

Shalom,
David

[Mark]

Yet we appear to have no biblcial support to demonstrate polygamy as wrong. Is it a sin to have more than one wife?

By the way, David had multiple wives (Ahinoam, Abigail and Bathsheba (see 1 Samuel 25:42-43). Genesis 25:6 states that Abraham had concubines (plural) which bore him sons.

[Golfnerd]

mark said:

Yet we appear to have no biblcial support to demonstrate polygamy as wrong. Is it a sin to have more than one wife?

By the way, David had multiple wives (Ahinoam, Abigail and Bathsheba (see 1 Samuel 25:42-43). Genesis 25:6 states that Abraham had concubines (plural) which bore him sons.

Where did the "concubine" issue land Abraham? We are witness to the results of that union as evidenced by the Muslim/Israel fighting. David KILLED Uriah to get Bathsheba.

Hmmm...track records ain't so good.

(Gen 2:24 RNKJV) Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.


notice the verbage...man - singular and wife - singular. ONE man and ONE woman. And from a practical standpoint - and no offense to any female members here - it's a full-time job to be married to just ONE woman - 25 blessed years this Dec - I can't IMAGINE what ist would be like with more...because they DO begin to cycle at the same time...Mark...you really don't want 10 or 20 wives all cycling together with PMS symptoms, DO YOU???

[Blake]

I think HaShem never banned having more than one wife because sometimes it was neccesary for people such as kings to have multiple wives in order forge alliances and maintain loyalty. Do you think David could have gotten support from the tribe of Benjamen if he had not married Saul's daughter?

[Golfnerd]

blake said:

I think HaShem never banned having more than one wife because sometimes it was neccesary for people such as kings to have multiple wives in order forge alliances and maintain loyalty. Do you think David could have gotten support from the tribe of Benjamen if he had not married Saul's daughter?

NOT true...

(Deu 17:14 NASB) "When you enter the land which the LORD your God gives you, and you possess it and live in it, and you say, 'I will set a king over me like all the nations who are around me,'

(Deu 17:15 NASB) you shall surely set a king over you whom the LORD your God chooses, one from among your countrymen you shall set as king over yourselves; you may not put a foreigner over yourselves who is not your countryman.

(Deu 17:16 NASB) "Moreover, he shall not multiply horses for himself, nor shall he cause the people to return to Egypt to multiply horses, since the LORD has said to you, 'You shall never again return that way.'

(Deu 17:17 NASB) "He shall not multiply wives for himself, or else his heart will turn away; nor shall he greatly increase silver and gold for himself.

[Mark]

Polygamy is elgitimate in because it provides a social condition that meets a specific need. It provides protection for the woman who might otherwise be left destitute because of war(Deut. 21:10-13) or because her husband has died otherwise(Deut 25:5-10). It's easy to side-step the position to state that there is biblical prescident for polygamy causing problems; yet there is biblical prescident for all obedience causing problems. Is anyone here willing to suggest either that polygamy is wrong or that it is a biblically legitimate relationship?

[Nachshon]

Mark has a very good point. I hold to my point of before that it is not ideal, but in some situations, if we are in a Biblical society, it becomes necessary.

Shalom,
David

[Golfnerd]

Polygamy is legitimate in because it provides a social condition that meets a specific need.

You can't reconcile this stance with what is clearly stated in the verses I posted. Doesn't a king lead by example? The king is forbidden to take multiple wives. Plus, marriage is clearly defined by God as one man and one woman coming together to be one flesh.

Every instance in Scripture of a man taking more than one wife had bad stuff happening as a result.

Polygamy is not something that God had in mind when He designed His creations.

(Gen 2:18 NASB) Then the LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him."

God didn't say "helpers" - plural here - He said "helper" - singular.

So, IMHO, ploygamy is something thought up by man and not God. It plays into an overindulgence of man's sexual appetite as well as creating the potential for a myriad of problems not the least of which is what happened to Solomon.

(1Ki 11:1 NASB) Now King Solomon loved many foreign women along with the daughter of Pharaoh: Moabite, Ammonite, Edomite, Sidonian, and Hittite women,

(1Ki 11:2 NASB) from the nations concerning which the LORD had said to the sons of Israel, "You shall not associate with them, nor shall they associate with you, for they will surely turn your heart away after their gods." Solomon held fast to these in love.

(1Ki 11:3 NASB) He had seven hundred wives, princesses, and three hundred concubines, and his wives turned his heart away.

(1Ki 11:4 NASB) For when Solomon was old, his wives turned his heart away after other gods; and his heart was not wholly devoted to the LORD his God, as the heart of David his father had been.

(1Ki 11:5 NASB) For Solomon went after Ashtoreth the goddess of the Sidonians and after Milcom the detestable idol of the Ammonites.

(1Ki 11:6 NASB) Solomon did what was evil in the sight of the LORD, and did not follow the LORD fully, as David his father had done.


(1Ki 11:9 NASB) Now the LORD was angry with Solomon because his heart was turned away from the LORD, the God of Israel, who had appeared to him twice,

(1Ki 11:10 NASB) and had commanded him concerning this thing, that he should not go after other gods; but he did not observe what the LORD had commanded.

(1Ki 11:11 NASB) So the LORD said to Solomon, "Because you have done this, and you have not kept My covenant and My statutes, which I have commanded you, I will surely tear the kingdom from you, and will give it to your servant.

I have to ask...why the interest in this?

[Nachshon]

And yet, Father never forbids it in . In fact, He regulates it, and, in certain cases, demands it.

Shalom,
David

[Golfnerd]

nachshon said:

And yet, Father never forbids it in . In fact, He regulates it, and, in certain cases, demands it.

Shalom,
David

Shalom David,

Please point me to where God says He wants us to take more than one wife.

Blessings,
Mark

[Nachshon]

Certainly, Akhi! Deuteronomy 25:5. Now, forgive me, I know this is a hypothetical. But, assuming that there could be a time when the man only has one brother, and assuming that that brother was already married, would that not ammount to a command to practice polygamy?
Aside from that, I think the strongest point that it is not forbidden is the fact that Father actually regulates polygamy.

Shalom,
David

[messimom]

Let me say first off that I think the murder and divorce rates of husbands would shoot up really quick would polygamy become legal again. LOL

Beyond that, I cannot find anywhere in the or otherwise where polygamy is expressly commanded or forbidden. It is true as in Deut 25:5 that the closest relative should take on the duties should the husband die, but even that has an out for a man who really wishes not to accept this(Deut 25:7-10).

That being the case, I think that if our country's laws allowed polygamy and it were socially acceptable(1 Peter 2:13-14) I think the matter would be highly personal between husband and wife. In as much as a wife should submit to her husband, he should love her as "Christ loves the church"--Yeshua loves the Kehilot, or however you would say it. If a husband truly loved his wife, wanting no pain to come to her and only the best for her, then he would not even consider taking on a second wife or mistress if she wasn't comfortable with the idea.

Any one, man or woman, who has dealt with any form of infidelity could tell you that it causes a lot of pain, mistrust and damage to a marriage, and if the husband considered a second wife or mistress without the wife's consent, it would definitely be considered infidelity to her.

Let me ask, how would a husband come to take on a second wife if it were not expressly related to a close family member dying, and him having to take on the husbandly responsibilities for the widow?

Mathew 5: 28 But I say to you that every one who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.

Shalom

Messimom

[Pioneer]

Very rarely get into this subject, God intended, so says his son, that man is to leave his mother and father and be joined to his wife and the two become one.
Original intent! He knew the flaws in man and allowed him lattitude, but warned him to behave himself! Paul in the NT tells you that you can be closer to God if you are unencumbered, and he also knew man's passion and lack of selfcontrol.
We are to live by the laws of the land, so we are limited by law to one wife.
"Be angry, but do not sin."
Shalom